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Dogma Training: Control Your Emotional Destiny
Marty describes himself as a perfectionist. "I can't stand failure," he declares. "I believe you either succeed or admit you're incompetent. Now my business is going bust -- my life is wrecked. I'm a hopeless loser." Panic. Depression. Rage. Self-pity. How can you function well and live happily under such heavy emotional burdens? According to world-renowned psychologist Dr. Albert Ellis, the first step to a healthier perspective is to recognize that your own dogmatic beliefs and behavior fuel your upsets. "People drive themselves to despair by turning sensible wishes, desires, and goals into absolutistic shoulds, oughts, and musts," he explains. "You work hard -- by thinking, feeling, and behaving -- to upset yourself." Ellis calls the process of turning adversities into intolerable situations catastrophizing. When you irrationally exacerbate your misfortunes, you seek ways of feeling better fast. Maybe you try relaxation techniques. Maybe you keep yourself busy, socialize more, exercise, or even indulge in alcohol or drugs. Too often, these "quick fixes" only work temporarily, distracting you without actually helping you get better. Wouldn't you rather be permanently less depressable, even when very strong adversities occur in your life? In his new book, FEELING BETTER, GETTING BETTER, STAYING BETTER: PROFOUND SELF-HELP THERAPY FOR YOUR EMOTIONS, Dr. Ellis draws on his 50 years of experience as a psychotherapist to offer sensible, inspiring advice for lasting self-improvement. Long acclaimed for his development of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), Ellis encourages a proactive approach to life's setbacks. "You are a problem-solver, a constructor of how you react psychologically," he enthuses. "You can choose to refuse to create your upset and to work toward more helpful ways of reacting to traumas." REBT works by persistently challenging Irrational Beliefs (IBs), and transforming them back into Rational Beliefs (RBs), or healthy preferrings. As you begin to abandon self-defeating values for self-enhancing ones, you strive for Unconditional Self-Acceptance (USA) whether or not you do well or earn the approval of others. "You may still hold high standards for yourself," Ellis notes, "but you do not rate your total self on the basis of those standards." FEELING BETTER, GETTING BETTER, STAYING BETTER offers detailed examples, practical exercises, and warm wisdom for gaining and maintaining emotional well-being. Constructive self-work includes: --Minimizing Low Frustration Tolerance and maximizing High Frustration Tolerance. --Shifting your perspective on misfortune from "What if?" to "So what if?" --Understanding, then assertively disputing your disturbing beliefs until you come to disbelieve them. "As you work on the adventure of achieving minimal upsetting," Dr. Ellis advises, "you can reframe your perception of adversity to find better solutions to your problems -- and have less chance of recreating them in the future." Albert Ellis, Ph.D., is the author of more than sixty-five books on psychotherapy, relationship therapy, and self-help. He has been rated by psychologists and counselors in the United States as one of the most influential psychologists of our time. He has "revolutionized" psychotherapy since 1955, when he created Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), the first of the now-popular cognitive behavior therapies. Dr. Ellis is a practicing psychologist, president of the Albert Ellis Institute in New York City, and a featured speaker at workshops and conferences throughout the world.. FEELING BETTER, GETTING BETTER, STAYING BETTER is available from Internet booksellers and local bookstores or directly from Impact Publishers, Inc. at 1-800-246-7228.
FEELING BETTER, GETTING BETTER, STAYING BETTER Profound
Self-Help Therapy for Your Emotions by Albert Ellis, Ph.D. ISBN: 1-886230-35-8
-- 272 pages -- Trade paperback -- $15.95 -- June 2001
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Better, Getting Better, Staying Better
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