New Sense of Vulnerability Breeds Desire for Sex
and Connection by Singles
Chicago, IL Since the September 11th attacks on the U.S.,
single men and women across the country are feeling a primal desire for
both sex and companionship. Following the disaster, single people who
live alone are flocking to find comfort with neighbors, friends, and at
bars, where "end-of-the-world sex" is frequently resulting. "Terror sex"
has become a way for many singles to cope with terrifying feelings of
vulnerability and sadness, according to an article in the Los Angeles
Times. A 39-year-old television producer admits, "I just wanted random
sex…I was so frightened. I wanted to feel protected." Sociologists acknowledge
a subconscious, instinctive need in humans to ensure survival of the species,
especially in times of war or disaster. As a matter of fact, they are
predicting a baby boom nine months from now.
Although the incidence of casual sex in singles appears to have increased,
many singles are realizing a deeper need for companionship and connection
in these unpredictable times. If they haven’t sought solace in another’s
arms, they have found comfort in renewing their ties to their communities.
The hunger for companionship has taken many forms, including some who
have made surrogate families out of friends, and others who have found
a sense of community by volunteering. There is also reason to believe
that changing values may be encouraging singles to loosen the rigid criteria
they once applied to finding a mate. As one divorced woman puts it: "Maybe
we’ll date men who are bald; maybe we’ll learn to take each other warts
and all."
An article in The New York Times reports that singles services across
the country are experiencing an upswing in business. The Social Network
of Chicago has likewise had a significant increase in new applicants.
"Single people are feeling pressure now to live a life of meaning," says
Eileen Messier, President and Founder of The Social Network, who adds,
"They’re looking for a sense of community, a group of people to belong
to and find comfort with. And they’re looking for something more meaningful
than a casual fling." This sentiment is being echoed by singles who claim
they are tired of game-playing and understand "the value of belonging
to someone." It appears, as one single New Yorker put it, that "the positive
side of vulnerability is an open heart."
The Social Network provides the sort of community experience singles are
looking for since the attack. Members, ages 25-57, are successful, healthy
professionals and can connect with other career-minded, available adults
in Chicago who are selected for membership based on character and integrity.
They attend a variety of events ranging from sporting events to topical
seminars to black-tie affairs, and also participate in charity events.
The members are not interested in joining a dating service or the bar
scene, and find The Social Network a reliable way to meet quality single
professionals like themselves.
For more information about this topic or The Social Network, please contact
Anneli Spielman at 312/944-9898 or visit the website at www.thesocialnetwork.com.
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